The Fellows are Opening for Jon and Ken

by The Calculus Affair

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04:13

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We are, all of us, both parent and child.

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released July 22, 2014

Written and performed by Paul Mariz
Mastered by Adam Straney at BreakPoint Mastering
Cover art features a sketch by Kevin Hyatt

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The Calculus Affair Seattle, Washington

The Calculus Affair is the solo project of Seattle musician Paul Mariz. Paul plays music out in the world as a member of The Rejections, a band made up of novelists and their trailing spouses (of which he is the latter).

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Track Name: The Man Who Used to Hunt Cougars for Bounty
Coming to the V.U. on a cold fall night,
Blending with the crowd in my trenchcoat and a tie.
Everyone will dance and we will rock and roll,
All night long.

The Fellows are Opening for Jon and Ken,
Helping us to reach a state of teenage Zen.
As cool as anything that I knew,
I knew I was wrong.

And you wanting everyone you know to always be okay....

Follow you at night, you go across Red Square,
It's one in the morning and there's no one else there.
Kneeling in the fountain, hear your whispers in the dark.

The viewing of the sky in telephoto lens,
Gave me the illusion we could just be friends.
Now we're shaking hands, agree to always drift apart.

And I loved you so even though,
You would already leave me.
You took a stand next to,
"The Man Who Used to Hunt Cougars for Bounty."
Track Name: Desperation Suits You
I am afraid you don't hold my best interests.
You rope your arms around my neck and squeeze.
Carry on this way, leave me as wreck while you're at ease.

Tripping at times we go and do things your way,
It's my own failing for letting you decide.
It breaks my heart, but I'm going to let it slide.

Try on other clothes too,
But each time desperation suits you.

When I wake up so early in the morning,
I just want us to get along.
It breaks my heart admitting I was wrong.

Try out other styles too,
Always desperation suits you.

I am afraid you can't hold it together.
All I can do is watch it while it falls apart.
It breaks us up, you know it breaks my heart.
You know it breaks my heart.
Track Name: Hollow Hellos
It's late at night with my eyes on the road,
And the bridges are down but still everything's slow.
And the traffic reports are ignoring the cracks,
That have formed in the walls that were holding you back

From hollow hellos

And then out of the dark comes a series of lights,
That the pattern is there only proves you were right.
I stare at the window only hoping to see,
You coming back to me,

With hollow hellos

It's late at night and my thinking is slow.
But I'm waiting up and I think that you know.
Track Name: Just You and Your Madness
Picking at your sutures like you do,
That particular kind of torture that always soothes.
And I can tell you want to mean it now,
You just don't know how.

Putting on your makeup for the show,
You play the lightening rod,
Who am I playing?
I don't know, I just don't know and I don't care,
After all it's just you and your madness sitting there.

Rifle through your papers it must be here,
You know you wrote it down when it was clear.
And I can tell you really knew it then,
It was better when,
It was just you and your madness as your only friend.

From far away you probably think you'll see it through,
But it's just you and your madness,
Running away with you.

You've perfectly deflected the assault.
You find this stuff amusing?
You should laugh, it's your fault.
But I don't think you know that it's not fair,
Think you're not aware,
That it's just you and your madness sitting there.
Track Name: Jenny
Everyone you're going to turn into,
Is going to leave the world behind.
You're going to put that load right down on me,
But I guess that I...never mind.
I wanna believe that anybody,
Can bend instead of break.
But to judge by the things that you are now,
It would seem like a big mistake.

Are you still mad? Well who could blame you?
Jenny, it's a long way up into the air,
And sometimes you're not there.

Now you say you're going to take it on,
Then cast it off like a rolling stone.
Everything is almost in its place,
'Til you realize your mind is blown.
I wanna believe the everybody,
Sees you as really are.
I wish that you'd just take the very first step,
But I doubt that you'll get that far.

Are you still wrecked? I can't explain you.
Jenny, you're a long way gone into the air,
But sometimes you're not there.

In the end there's little harm that's done,
But you give yourself a scare,
Pressing buttons in the panic room,
'Til you realize there's no one there.
I wanna believe that it's all right,
Just living for the day.
But I wonder why you reel it in,
Just to throw it all away.

Are you so sad? Does it still pain you?
Jenny, it's a long way down into despair.
Sometime you're not there.

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